Tiffany Pulliam and the red flags

Well it took me two days to clam down before I could write this. I didn't want to write angry so i did what my dad tells me to do...I paused. Looking back at the last 6 months with Miss Tiffany, there were many red flags I choose not to act on.

The first being she had a male companion there for 3 days right after we started. I really didn't like the fact that there was a man who I did not know possibly alone with my daughter. I rationalized that, well Tiffany has to be close by right?? But you just never know, and I really don't like adults that i don't know one on one with my daughter. This continued, and other "friends" were over during the day with Miss Tiffany. Mostly female. I met her ex-husband once....he didn't even introduce himself. Seemed pretty shady. There was also one time I saw her teenage son carry Logan (12 months or so at the time) down the steps like he was a sack of food. I can't say i'm at all comfortable knowing a teenage boy is carrying around my kid. A few other times something has happened where she didn't like something i did or said and gave me a HUGE adatude about it. It seemed like if she was having a bad day she's practical throw your kid at you. One time one of the babies, Vilot, wouldn't stop crying and she simply put her upstairs by herself. When her dad got there she told him she had to put her upstairs due to her crying and shoved her into his arms and said Thank God you're here. The thought of my little girl crying and no one doing anything about it is scary.

ok to the story:

this past weekend Dave's dad and Kathleen were down for the weekend. They left on Monday afternoon so I decided to keep Emery for the morning so they could be with her. By the time they left Em was sleeping and I texted miss Tiffany to tell her i'd keep em for the day. She texted me back about her check. I told her i had to go to the bank anyway and i'd just deposit it for her.

I left for the bank and to meet my mom for lunch. As i was walking out of the bank I saw a text from Tiffany saying she had to go out anyway and just to bring the check by. I wrote her back that i had already deposited it. She texted about how i had her account number and that she asked me not to deposit it myself. I said I had a voided check from her from a fews back when we tried to do direct deposit. She was not happy about this and said we'd talk tomorrow. About 45 minutes later I get a text saying that her daughter Amanda went to the bank and they had no transaction that I had deposited her check.....reality check: anyone in the modern world will tell you it can take up to 24 hours for a check to clear, AND yes there is no way they would know unless she went to the same branch and had them go through the paperwork herself. .... so i tell her via text that i have the deposit slip and i'd bring it with me when i came to her tomorrow. She asked me what account i put the money in and i told her i'd call her as soon as i got home and give her the number b/c i didn't have it on me. (i had filled out a deposit slip before i left the house) So at this point, i'm thinking what the hell is her deal. I GAVE her money, and put it right into her account.

I get home and call her house line and her cell. no answer. I check my email and i have an email that says (direct copy and paste": "You can pick up Emery's things this afternoon...I'll have everything all packed up. Thanks, Tiffany" so you can imagine at this point my blood is boiling. I write her back "you're kicking us out??" and proceed to call her again. This time she picks up and tells me she's been wanting to ask us to leave for a while now and that she's not a beggar and shouldn't have to gravel for her money. This is somewhat humorous since i put the money directly into her account. I told her that I put the money into her account, she tells me this isn't the first or second or third time this has happened. I said the only other time I forgot the check i brought cash with me when i picked up Emery b/c i knew she couldn't get to the bank. I also tell her i deposited her check directly into her account today...She then proceeds to yell to her daughter, while we're on the phone, to log into her wachovia account to see if the money is there. She tells her to check again, and then tells me it's not in there (I KNOW!!). so I tell her it will be by midnight.

Then she goes on to tell me I crossed a personal boundary with her when i "rummaged" through her fridge (putting Emery's milk/yogurt in) and rummaged through her draw (the one time i reached in to get a pen, to fill out her check). Now i can see this as me being too comfortable in her home, but she has 8 kids there (yes 8 not 6 like the law states)and i thought i'd do it myself vs giving her one more thing to do. That's how i operate. I brought up how many kids she had at one point and she flat out lied and said she only has 5 or 6 at any given time. When i said i'd counted more then that she said i must have come in the one hour she had a neighbor's kid. This was a total lie, because she has Connor, Noah, Morgan, Logan, Seana, Johna all full time. That's 6. Lilly is there 4 days a week, as was Emery, and Violet is there sometimes as well as this other kid with a really big head, who's name i don't know. So really she ALWAYS has more then 6. And these are just the kids i see. who knows what goes on in the middle of the day. Oh and to add to the personal attack, she tells me there is an obviously a lack of discipline at our house. (WHAT? my daughter is 1! I almost said to her "yea the late night partying and back talk IS getting out of control") Babies are meant to be babied.

So we're at the point where she's personally attacking me, and lying to me....this from the person that calls herself "a business".... (did i mention she didn't claim us on her taxes, so we couldn't deduct our child care) then she comes in with the kicker....but first some back story:
....about a month ago i came to drop off Emery and all the kids were eating breakfast. Miss Tiffany seemed very frustrated this morning and seemed to be at her wits end. Connor who i think is around 2 years old, threw his food or spit or something like that. She reacted by yelling at him pulling him from the the chair and putting him in the other room by himself with the door closed. Now i have no problem with time out. BUT this was a bit more than that. she acted out of anger. which i saw again with her email to me to come pick up em's things that was time stamped about 20 minutes after her last text to me. actions out of anger are NEVER good, and ever worst when it's the person watching your kid. I was really upset about the whole thing and almost just turned around and left with Emery. I talked to Dave that night about it. He decided to give her a call to talk about it. She became very defensive, but by the end of the conversation it seemed to work itself out....
.....back to present story: Tiffany brings up this and says that i had my husband call her, which i think she sees as me hiding behind Dave. Dave handles these things better so he called. Whatever. Then she tells me that how she treats other children is "non of my business" OK really? How you treat kids...one being mine...isn't my businesses??? So at this point I know i need to get off the phone b/c she is no longer rational. I simply say I'll be sending my brother in law over to get her things, what would you like to do about the $125 I just deposited into your account? She makes some remark about how she thinks i didn't deposit it, and i come back with "i'll call you when i see it has been cleared and you can write me a check"

So Tuesday morning, well look at that, there's the check cleared. I call her and leave her the most professional message i can just saying I saw the check cleared and if she could please put it in the mail to us. She called back, I gave her our address and got off the phone as quickly as i could.

In the meantime I called Children's Nook and spoke with the director. Emery has been first on the waiting list for some time now and Dave and I have been talking about alternate care for over a month. As luck would have it, there is a little boy leaving the infant room and Emery will take his spot starting next Monday.

After i calmed down and thought about everything, it's true what my friend Tymillia said. God knows what's he's doing. Had we left earlier or later we might have missed out on the spot.

So there you have it. the whole story.